7 Tips on how to live abroad, find work and be happy.

You want to live abroad? What is the secret of settling in and being happy in your new country? In a nutshell: being open-minded and proactive. Oh, and cycling. I started as a tour guide on a bicycle this year and I love it. It never crossed my mind to be a tour guide in the past, but somehow it came on my path and it suits me. Tour guiding is social, it is outdoors and it keeps me fit. It is the perfect job alongside my other job: writing.

Two questions I get asked on a daily basis by my Dutch tour guide clients: how did I end up in Valencia en what is life like here? Everyone on holiday always secretly wants to figure out if they could move here too and what it would take to make it happen. “You are so lucky to live here”. Let me tell you.

1. Only sunshine is free

Living in Spain has nothing to do with “being lucky”. It takes a long time and many headaches to make the decision to emigrate, to plan the move, to make it happen. It takes a lot of effort to settle in, to navigate around your new country and all the new rules and systems, to try and speak a new language. And of course, to start earning money. There are a lot of hurdles along the way. If I tell people that the average wages here are around €1,000 net per month full time, a little bit of the glamour soon disappears. Living abroad can be amazing, especially when there are 300 days of sunshine year, but you still got to pay the bills.

2. Reinvent yourself

To live abroad and be happy means you have to be flexible and proactive. The alternative is to be stuck indoors waiting for something to happen.You’ll soon end up being pretty lonely. And broke. You also have to put set ideas a side about who you are and what you do. You have to reinvent yourself a little bit. My career has always been in arts marketing, but when you move to Valencia, you’re simply not going to be able to find a similar job. Speaking Spanish is one thing, but Valenciano, the lingo of the public sector, is another. And then there is the high unemployment rate down here, which basically means saying goodbye to your previous line of work.

Ciudad de las artes y ciencias valencia

3. Be realistic and flexible when you live abroad

This is the second time in my life I have emigrated. Age 26 I moved from the Netherlands to Scotland, to be with my now husband. Not too big a deal when it came to cultural differences, but it still took a while to feel at home. In the Netherlands I had left a pretty decent job in the cultural sector. Expecting to “just continue my career abroad”, ended up being an illusion. I applied for a few jobs that were in my field and at my level, but my English was not fluent yet in terms of professional jargon and I made a complete fool of myself at one interview. I can still recall the shame, frustration and sadness I felt afterwards.

Now I could have done two things: go home and give up, or get back up for round two. What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger, right? I however chose to be realistic and go for something a bit less ambitious that would at least get my foot in the door. I soon got hired as an admin assistant at an arts centre, and a year later I got promoted to their marketing manager. Learning the language however is often the only way to get anywhere in a foreign country. If you don’t, then that law degree or masters in business administration is not going to get you very far. You just got to start somewhere. If that is in a coffee shop as a waitress for a year (nothing wrong with doing that forever either by the way), then enjoy it and pick up the language while you work.

4. Transfer your skills and find your niche

What skills do you have that are transferable? What are you good at? Other than that as a Dutchie I was born on a bike, I have always been a communicator. I am good at writing, am creative by nature and I like helping others. I’m a practical ‘tick those boxes’ kind of girl. Those skills are useful in all kinds of jobs, you just have to recognise them and put them to good use. With high unemployment here in Spain and not speaking Spanish much yet, I decided to set myself up as a freelancer, or autonóma, in marketing for expats.

In a city like Valencia however, there are many other expats doing similar things and the competition is high. Time to zoom in and stand out from the crowd. Yes, I can design a WordPress site, a flyer and I can keep a facebook page alive, but my strength lies in writing. And I am bilingual: I speak and write fluent English and Dutch. Although I focused on English speaking clients at first, soon I received more requests for web content in Dutch. I unexpectedly realised that is my niche. Writing web content in Dutch. Who would have thought.

5. Look for local clients…or go online

If you live abroad and are looking for clients s a freelancer – whether you are a writer, designer or even an English teacher (another job usually available for foreigners), you can do two things. You can advertise your skills locally and try and find clients nearby. The other thing, which I found is what most other expats do over here, is go online – and work remotely. Sites like Upwork, Fiverr and others enable you to attract clients from all over the world. This means you can also do your job anywhere in the world. The digital nomad is born! Even better is to bring existing clients with you. If you set yourself up as a freelancer abroad, then you can offer your clients back home prices VAT free, as countries have a tax agreement for these kinds of payments. And offering things without the added VAT is of course attractive.

6. Talk to lots of people: be visible

Unless you have all your clients online, it pays to show face. Go to network events, especially those with other expats. Talking to people might bring opportunities. If others know you are looking for work, friends, things to get involved with, sooner or later something will come up. For the introverts this is not always an easy thing to do, but it is pretty much essential if you want to get out of the house and integrate.

Even ‘showing face’ in local Facebook groups can help you become more visible. It’s been vital for me, especially in Valencia, to get to know people, look for work, make connections and feel a bit more part of the community. Social media has its flaws, but it has also made it so much easier to find like-minded people in a new environment. If you are self-employed being visible on social media is very important. Advertise your services to other expats or locals and before you know it, you have your first little contract – which, if you’ve done a good job, may lead to more.

autonoma in spain

7. Learn the language when you live abroad

First it was English and the local Scottish dialect Doric, now it is Spanish – and even Valenciano – it is a constant adaptation process. If you want to live abroad and just be in your own little bubble, not learning the local language will keep you there for sure. And no, it isn’t easy, but what in life is? Lucky to live here? No, hard work, baby. You feel like a right idiot a lot of the times and you sometimes feel you’ll never ever going to be able to hold a conversation…but you just have to keep going, mistakes and all. Tranquila.

Anyone who has ever moved abroad (to a non-English speaking country) has had to learn a foreign language at some point. The other day I heard a great phrase that applies to all of us migrants:”A foreign accent is a sign of bravery.” I’ll take that. Bit by bit. Poco a poco.

Life is not a race. What’s the educational hurry?

Last week we decided our eldest son would repeat his school year. It was after much headaches, tears (me) and consideration, and of course after talking with his teacher. Repeating the year? Shock horror. I always associated this concept with the kids who were really at the bottom of the class, somehow had developmental problems or otherwise behind. My kid? How? I felt I had failed him. I had mother’s guilt in ten fold.

Children are sponges

Maybe it was the guilt of having moved to Spain, pulling him out of his comfort zone and plunging him into a whole new and foreign environment. Did we gamble with his future by emigrating? Enrolled in a school at first in which he literally drowned, then since September a different school which he really likes, but obviously everything still is all in Spanish. “It is such a gift to a child moving to a different country, what an experience!” I keep hearing from people who have never done it. “Children are sponges, they pick up the language so fast.” Sure, both my boys speak quite a bit of Spanish after 18 months, children’s language of course. That doesn’t mean they also miraculously catch up in all school subjects in Spanish – and Valenciano. And when even maths becomes a struggle, you start to wonder if perhaps life is going a little too fast for a small boy.

Falling behind

My 7-year old has a vivid imagination, is very creative and loves art. He is easily distracted and has a sensitive soul. He is also terribly stubborn and has never liked people telling him what to do, from potty training to learning to read. But then he is also very social, caring and makes friends easily. He loves to play. Last but not least, he is a December baby. In Scotland that meant he was the youngest in class and in Spain this is no different. For some children no problem. For others it is.

I remember when my son was 4 years old I asked his school back in Scotland if he could have an extra year in nursery. The boy could not sit still and was in my eyes far from ready to do any form of academic learning. Normal right, for a 4-year old child? “No” was the clear answer I got, “His birthday is in December, so he will be going to Primary 1. He has no clear developmental reasons to be kept behind.” Behind. An interesting word.

Sitting still age 4

So off he went to Primary 1, this tiny active playful boy age 4.5. Two months later we received a letter from his teacher. “We are informing you that we are having to give your son additional support, because he has difficulty focusing on forming and recognising letters. “Well yes, I know”, I thought. “I told you so. He is 4.” But hey, the train had left and we were on it. The system required he should do a certain trick by a certain date and he was falling ‘behind’. He continued to refuse any form of homework for the rest of Primary 1. Still he now reads chapter books like the rest of them.

Seeing a child for who he is

Fast forward three years and we are in Spain. Was it the added anxiety of moving that made him struggle so much? Maybe. Is my child less intelligent than the others? Well, no. His teacher said two things: “It is the language, yes,…but it is also his maturity. He is very young. And he wants to play.” When she said those things, it all fell into place. Although hearing that your child is not doing well in school is hard on a mother, somebody finally just seeing your child for who he is, feels like a relief. Somebody recognised that our son was perhaps in the wrong year all along. Pushed ahead because of a silly birth date. “He could go to the next year, yes, he could do it with extra support”, she said, “But why? It will be much better for him to stay where he is, be a little bit older, feel more confident and have more time to adapt.” The train had stopped. Thank you, teacher.

La vida no es una carrera

My son is happy with the idea of repeating thankfully, which is one headache less. When I told the news to the parents in his class however, I received mixed reactions. There were the high achieving parents:”Really? Por que? It is not needed. You should get a second opinion! With extra support he can do it!”. Then there was the majority:”That sounds like a very wise idea, he will be totally OK. And his friends will still be here in the playground.” And then there were quite a few mothers who actually admitted to me that they too felt stressed about school, how their children were hurried along and how they felt the peer pressure.”La vida no es una carrera” (life is not a race), I had written in my message to the class mums, and it obviously made them stop, think and breathe.

Resilience and memories

Life is not a race. Why do we get upset when our child gets the advice to repeat the year? Because we take it personally. Our own ego is playing up. We judge ourself as a parent. We should have done more, we have failed. Our child is lost. Not as good as the rest. What will become of him? Nonsense, of course. But that’s how it feels.

Would he have had the same advice in Scotland? Probably not. Repeating is seen as a bit old fashioned and not usually done nowadays. Still, if it works, it works, time will tell. And what if our children have their own path in life? Something we as parents cannot micro manage? Perhaps it was needed to have this tricky first year in Spain. Maybe it has made my son more resilient, teaching him valuable life skills already, way beyond any academic learning. And maybe it was meant for someone to step in and slow down my son’s childhood. To give him that extra year of being small. To stop the anxiety and feel calmer. Him and me. After all, childhood is precious and memories last. We just have to love them and walk beside them.

Learning happens all the time

How often do you still recall something from your childhood? Those short years have such a big influence on the rest of our lives. What are the best memories you have? I bet a lot of those memories are to do with freedom. Being with other children, running outside, going swimming, camping in the woods, making up stories, building dens, playing hide and seek, just simply having fun and being a kid. Very little adult intervention. School yes, it was there, but for me it certainly wasn’t something I now see as the most important aspect of my early childhood or how it shaped me. And this is how it should be. Learning happens all the time, everywhere. School has its place, but childhood is so much more. Let’s not let that precious time rush by. It goes quick enough anyway. We shall see what September brings. Summer first.

Traveling solo at 40 versus traveling solo at 23. What’s changed?

Do you enjoy traveling solo? I have just spent two weeks in and around Singapore this month. Never been to South-east Asia before, plus I hadn’t traveled solo for longer than a few days, for many, many years. I was so excited! No kids, alone, peace and quiet. Adventure! What a gift. Off I went, to the other side of the world. It was amazing, but I also learnt a thing or two about myself. Things just ain’t the same, two kids later at the age of 40.

I backpacked solo around Latin America in 2002 for three months, at the tender age of 23. Just graduated from university I had been working hard to save money for the big trip. I booked my flights, organised my first hostel, found a Spanish school in Quito to brush up on the much needed lingo. And then I went. Ten days later I ended up with a drip in my arm in hospital in Ecuador, after contracting an e.coli infection, probably by drinking a smoothie made with tap water. Not a great start. Good god, was I ill. My mother was worried sick and suggested I’d come home. No way! I was young, free and fearless and after four days in hospital and being discharged with a large pack of antibiotics in my pocket, I continued my journey. Got sick, now I’m better. I felt immortal! But I understand my mother, now I have children of my own.

traveling solo ecuador
Living with an indigenous family in the Andes mountains in Ecuador for a week.

I ended up having three unforgettable months, teaching me common sense, resilience, resourcefulness and flexibility. The experiences, the sights, the people, the smells, the colours, the tastes, everything was incredibly intense. Those three months have had a huge impact on my life and gave me lasting memories. I never felt so free, alive and strong as back then. If you’ve been in my shoes, you know the feeling.

Hair pin roads and views to die for

Looking back, some memories now make me both shiver with fear and smile with delight. Being on a tight budget, I often traveled through the night for 12 hours on very old buses in Peru and Bolivia. Buses full of locals in their colourful attire, preaching evangelists and sometimes a chicken. Picture narrow bumpy hair pin roads through the Andes mountains, a struggling engine and steep drops. Some wrecks of cars down below in the ravine. No toilet on board. Brief stops on the way where you could quickly pee in a dirty makeshift toilet with a bucket to flush. I felt like a true explorer, a cool solo female traveler, a tough cookie who dealt with it all. I would share dormitories with fellow backpackers, heard the craziest stories, smoked pot once at high altitude, saw landscapes that were out of this world. Absolute freedom and no responsibilities.

Bus in Bolivia
Crossing the desert in Bolivia by bus, 2002

The thought of traveling on my own seventeen years later filled me with excitement to say the least. OK, I wasn’t going for three months nor was I going to be backpacking on a tight budget, but hey, I was going VERY. FAR. AWAY. Alone. Without kids. 12 hours on a plane? Whoah! Films, books, glass of wine. Peace. Couldn’t wait.

A good friend of mine was living in Singapore for a few years and I decided to take the opportunity to visit her, before she would move back to Europe. I knew it wasn’t going to be quite the same as backpacking in Bolivia, but maybe I could just get a tiny bit of that ‘cool female explorer’ freedom sensation back. Or could I?

Traveling alone to Singapore
The Gardens by the Bay, Singapore
Little India, Singapore

Being in Singapore is comfortable, modern and safe (oh, and a bit pricey). Staying at my friend’s house of course was also rather nice. Seeing a new city, country and culture is fabulous and Singapore is such a melting pot of skyscrapers and colourful neighbourshoods. But don’t you think everything is more intense when you are in your early twenties and experience it all for the first time? I had a fantastic holiday, I thoroughly enjoyed it. Still, I kept looking for that same thrill I felt at 23, but it was hard to find.

from host to hostel

After a week of Singapore city life and catching up with my friend, I decided to go somewhere else for a few days, truly traveling solo. I took the ferry to nearby Indonesian island Bintan. Indonesia, that surely would be different! And yes, it was indeed, even though it was only a stone throw’s away from Singapore. Whereas nobody even looks at you in Singapore, you get stared at, called and approached as soon as you set foot on the shores of Bintan. I had booked a hostel and luckily got picked up by one of the hostel owners so didn’t have to make my own way. The hostel looked very nice online. It was cheap and basic, but the pictures looked idyllic in a very laid-back, surf shack kind of way and it had very good reviews. I was hoping to meet fellow travelers, hang out with them in the evening, visit some places on the island. Just like the good ol’ days.

Traveling solo Indonesia

It was funny. As soon as I sat in that taxi, no airconditioning and a driver who didn’t really take the traffic rules very seriously (were there any?), I felt nervous. What was I doing here? Wooden huts and jungle lined the road, poverty all around. Scooters and mopeds like flies crossing and passing. The heat was suffocating. I told myself to get a grip and relax. After all, I wanted a bit of adventure and real experiences, right? I was looking forward arriving at the hostel, with its palm trees and lovely terrace, chat to some people and make the most of my time on the island.

Breakfast and ants included

Then the taxi slowed down and turned left into a dirt road. Wait, what? The hostel was right there, I could see it, but it didn’t quite look like the pictures. We got out and the hostel guy guided me into the reception area. Well, let’s call it the front room of a wooden shed. It was like a sauna. There was a water tank, a kettle and a bread bin with a few white slices in it “for breakfast”. There were ants marching across the table. Did I mention it was hot? There was a shared bathroom, with no actual shower nor a bath. There was one toilet that had to be flushed with a cup of water. I got shown the one dormitory in the hostel, with six bunks and noticed only one bed was taken. But she was out for the day. It was 2pm. There was nobody there but me and the hostel guy. “It was low season.”

heat and panic

I panicked. Sitting down on my bunk bed I frantically started to think. I was going to faint. What if I fainted? Was there a hospital? Would I get rescued? What if I got sick. I got sick before in a hot place like this. Could I get dengue fever? I was on my period. How would I wash? I could see a stripe of daylight in the wall of the dormitory. Were there cockroaches here? There must be cockroaches. Only one guest? What would I do? Was this hostel safe? Where would I eat? What would I eat? I am so hot. I can’t breathe. My heart was racing. I needed to calm down. What if I die? I have two kids. I want to go home. What was I thinking? I started crying. I’m 40 years of age, I have responsibilities. I can’t stay here. I need to stay alive. Am I being silly? I probably am, but I hate this place.

traveling solo Singapore

“It’s not you – it’s me”

Unlike in 2002, even this basic hostel had wi-fi. Thank god for wi-fi. I decided I wasn’t going to stay in that hostel. I felt like a cheat and a wimp but I needed to get myself to somewhere more comfortable. “Throw some money at the problem” my husband used to say, whenever you would find yourself in a situation that needed solved immediately. He hadn’t liked the idea of me traveling solo to this island and hostel in the first place. I swallowed my pride, found a resort 3 miles up the road and booked myself a room. The hostel guy was so apologetic and scared I would give him bad reviews, but I just told him it wasn’t him – it was me. “Oh my boy, I am naive, I am 40, I thought I could still do this but I can’t, I have changed. I have lost it.” was how I felt. Instead I said:”I need a shower and there is no shower.”

The resort was bliss. I felt like a spoiled lady of leasure. Slightly ashamed but so happy. A fabulous clean private room with a fan and working airconditioning. A view over the tropical white sandy beach, waving palm trees and blue waters. This was more like it. Just wow. I opened the mini bar, took out a cold Tiger beer and scoffed the two bags of complimentary crisps out of pure relief. Bloomin’ heck. Thank god for that. I might not be that adventurous explorer anymore, but you know what, that is OK. Been there, done that. Got the pictures. Got the stories. I’m still traveling solo, alright – just in a bit more comfort. Tomorrow I go snorkeling.

traveling solo Singapore

Are you addicted to your smartphone?

Admit it, the first thing you do when you wake up is look at your phone screen to check your social media. You are addicted to your smartphone. And take a look around you when you walk outside in the street, sit in the park or catch the bus; what do you see? How many people are staring at their mobile at that very moment? It is an epidemic and no one escapes. People do not seem to be able to do ‘nothing’ any more, use every second to take out the phone and check their social media feeds, email and other news. How serious is your own addiction?

addicted to your smartphone


Scared of boredom and missing out: addicted to your smartphone

Everyone seems addicted. Just check with yourself: how often do you check your smartphone on any particular day? Five times? Ten times? Every ten minutes? You are sitting in a cafe waiting for your friends. Or even worse, your friend gets up to use the bathroom. What do you do, do you pull out your phone? I know I do. You’re on the train. Do you read a book or are you looking out the window? I bet you’re not. Do you have a nice conversation with someone sitting opposite you? What in the world did we all do before the smartphone was invented

smartphone addiction


We feel that we are fully informed about everything and everyone via our telephone. We don’t want to miss out. But most news and updates are pretty volatile and superficial, there is very little depth, unless it is propaganda from one newspaper or another. What is really going in the life of a friend on Facebook? Do you know? You see pictures of their babies, their holidays, their night out. But how are they doing? What’s hiding behind those happy faces? They may well be depressed, but hey, thumbs up for that funny photo they posted.

Checking celebrities’ Instafeeds at 2am

You read a short article or watch a funny movie of a silly cat. But how useful is all that information, is it important or is it pure entertainment? Entertainment is fine, but perhaps we don’t need it every ten minutes. We all keep telling ourselves and everybody else that we are so incredibly busy. And yes, life is busy and stressful. Work, kids. Social activities. But how true is this statement really when you seem to have time to scroll the Instagram feeds of Kim Kardashian for hours before bedtime. Then only to switch back to Facebook to see what’s new. It is a circle of infinity. And are you really influencing people’s opinions by mixing in online discussions with strangers, anonymous facebookers or twitterers, who you don’t know and from which you draw conclusions based on a few comments? Does it change the world? More importantly…does it make you feel good?

smartphone addiction

How great would you feel about yourself if you had spent those two lost hours on getting fit or doing something creative?

Without wanting to sound like your grandmother, we spend way too many hours on the mobile, wasting our time on absolute nonsense. You may jump to the defense, saying yes, but it is useful to quickly reply to some emails when I’m waiting for someone anyway. I’d say (to myself too), let’s give it a try, keep the mobile in our pocket next time we have a spare minute. Whether it is on the metro or while waiting for the kettle to boil. If you are not addicted to your smartphone, this should be an easy task. Notice what you see and hear around you. Maybe a wonderful silence. Mindfulness and all that, right?

Give your brain a break

Being alone with our thoughts, just sitting somewhere alone in public, can be scary for some people, but is in fact very healthy. All information overload that you stuff into your head all day, and especially via your smartphone and the internet, also needs time and space to be processed in your brain. Do you have trouble falling asleep at night? Or do you notice that you get annoyed quickly by small issues or people around you? This may well be the result of your addiction to the smartphone. Not healthy at all, and it only increases anxiety. Is this setting a good example for the next generation?

Take away the temptation

And then we are not even talking about the impact on work or studies. Your phone is probably sitting on your desk next to you while you are working. When you are addicted to your smartphone, the temptation is to constantly check it. New Whatsapp messages? And what happens on Twitter? Because of this constant interruption, you can concentrate less and your brain cannot absorb important information when you are constantly switching from one thing to the next. Of course you know all these things, but an addiction is hard to break. Just put your phone in another room. Better still, buy a safe and lock it.

smartphone addiction

Ready to kick the habit?

Are you addicted to your smartphone and really want to make a positive change? Here are a few things you can bring into your life to help you kick the habit.

  • Install usage tracker apps on your phone to remind you
  • Turn off notifications for apps, so your mobile doesn’t constantly attracts attention
  • Make a promise to put the phone away after the work day is over
  • Put your phone on the charger in the kitchen, not in your bedroom
  • Buy an old fashioned alarm clock, don’t use your mobile for it
  • Have a smartphone-free day – or even hour! – a week and do something positive
  • Carry an old fashioned street map and a notebook with you
  • Delete social media apps off your smartphone (ouch!)
  • Use an egg timer to become more productive: set aside 15 minutes for smartphone checking after at least one hour of doing something else.


A yoga retreat in the hills of Valencia

Shifting mindsets and gaining clarity

I turned 40 at the start of the year and I decided to celebrate this milestone by going on a yoga retreat in Valencia. Or more precisely, in the beautiful hills of Favara, just 45 minutes south of the city. Bliss! I had seen yoga teacher Jennison Grigsby‘s yoga events advertised before and a friend had become a bit of an retreat addict, so I decided to join her on the trip to see what it was all about. It turned out to be much more than just a ‘fun weekend’ without the kids. It was a mind opener and a perfect kickstart of the year ahead.

Yoga with Jennison

Jennison has been organising English-speaking yoga classes in Valencia for a few years now. originally from California, Jennison teaches a dynamic Vinyasa Flow as well as slower-paced yin yoga, often outdoors in the park or on the beach. What mostly makes her stand out from any other yoga in Valencia are her yoga experiences, such as a pure relaxation session combining yoga and reiki, a beautiful yoga & piano combo, full moon yoga classes….and of course her weekend retreats, which she organises in Spain and also Italy.

We are all in the same boat

The January yoga weekend was packed with great yoga sessions, yes, but it was so much more than that. It was also a weekend of bonding with women from different countries and different backgrounds who at first sight looked worlds apart but turned out to have so much in common. We are really all in the same boat. Some on rougher seas than others, but all trying to stay afloat, as mothers, busy worker bees or figuring out what to next in life. Sharing a weekend like this with other women is very powerful. We all carry so much, we all doubt ourselves too often and to feel connected like this, helps.


Nothing more healing than belly laughs and a walk in the hills. Plus what’s better than having all your food prepared for you three times a day? Not needing to do any dishes? The talented sisters of catering business Hinojo. prepared delicious vegan and vegetarian food. Then there was the stunning location. Picture a midcentury modern villa set in the mountains, with views to die for, a swimming pool (too cold to dive into but hey, there is always one…) and clear starry nights. It all felt utterly indulgent, but so good for my tired soul.

Yoga retreat Valencia

Intention setting and manifesting your dreams

One of the things during the weekend that really helped focus the mind, was intention setting. Rather than setting yourself goals, an intention allows you to free yourself from the limits of strict outcomes. It creates space for growth, expansion, and change, resulting in less pressure and unnecessary expectations. Setting intentions helps you to create big lifestyle changes rather than focusing on one specific goal.

So what did we do? You take a journal and jot down everything you want in life, no matter how crazy it may sound at the time! Want a villa in the mountains? Find your soulmate? Become debt free? Seeing it written down is step one. Then the next step, how are you going to set the wheels in motion and help the universe to do the rest? (“I intend to…”)

Most of my wishes were to do with my family life and how I wanted things to go a bit more smoothly and with more patience and compassion. Being a mum of two, a wife and self employed all in one – plus the fact that we recently emigrated to Spain, has not been an easy ride. Trying to look after everyone and everything is exhausting and you just keep putting yourself and your well-being at the bottom of the list. I have always felt a lot of resistance to expressing my own needs (being needy is weak, right?), so to write down what I wanted felt alien and selfish. But even doing that was so needed.

And then we all had to pull a card out of a stack of cards with different phrases and meanings, to see what was relevant to you at that very moment. Guess what I pulled? Spooky.

intention setting cards
mindfullness Valencia

Express your own needs and feel unapologetic about it

One of the more materialistic things I wrote down was that I wanted to earn more money. Well, what am I going to do to set the wheels in motion? Up my prices, ask for what I am worth and feel unapologetic about it! For years I always thought I was “still learning”, “others are much better at this sort of thing” etc, which resulted with me pricing my work too low. Writing down that I wanted to change this and that I was going to feel confident about it, was very liberating. (And you know what? On Monday I emailed two of my long term clients with the news that I was upping my prices….and they were fine with it! Because they replied :”I provide quality work for them and they value this”. It was clearly time I started valuing myself in the same way!)

yoga in valencia

I would book myself on one of these weekend retreats again without any hesitation. As you get travel, accommodation, activities and all food and drinks included, they are the price of a short holiday. But if you can treat yourself to it, or have a milestone to celebrate like I did, I thoroughly recommend it. It may just change your view on life, yourself and the future.

yoga with jennison videos

In the meantime, if anyone would like to enjoy some of Jennison’s yoga, please head over to her 21-day yoga challenge on Youtube, which I have just completed myself.

Have a great week! Or as the retreat slogan says: “Namaste all day”


yoga in valencia

Product review: Abeego beeswax food wrap

The beeswax food wrap is a great alternative for cling film or foil. I have been meaning to try these types of wraps out for ages, so I was very happy when the Ethical Superstore asked me to do a review for them. I am pleased to say, they are not only pretty easy to use, they also smell great! As I want to cut down on the amount of plastic waste in my home, I’ll definitely be using these from now on.

exclusive reader Discount code

Want to make use of a great discount offer? You get £3 off your first order (no minimum spend and you can use the discount for other products too).

Just use the exclusive code X3NNA. Offer ends 31/3/2019. www.ethicalsuperstore.com

Product review Abeego Beeswax Food wraps

I am reviewing the Abeego beeswax food wraps from Ethical Superstore today, which come in different packs. I am reviewing the pack that contains three Abeegos – small (18 x 18cm), medium (25 x 25cm) and large (33 x 33cm), priced at £15.00. They have other sizes, a pack of six and larger packages too. The Abeego is a sustainable food wrap made from certified organic cotton and hemp, and keeps food fresher for longer. Another big plus? They come in a recyclable cardboard box, rather than plastic wrapping (you wouldn’t believe how many ‘eco-friendly’ products do!)

Antibacterial properties to keep food fresh

Although the idea of reusing something to cover your food may sound a little unhygienic, the Abeego beeswax wraps are in fact coated with tree resin for its natural antiseptic properties. In addition to that they contain jojoba oil which is anti-fungal and of course the beeswax which is naturally antibacterial. All good and natural! As Abeego is made from a cloth material rather than plastic, it will allow the food to breathe and naturally age, preventing mould and keeping leftovers fresh.

Beeswax food wrap review

What do you use beeswax food wraps for?

The Abeego beeswax food wraps are great for wrapping sandwiches, fruit and veg for picnics or lunch. If you have leftover dinner or salad, the wraps are also perfect for covering your dish or bowl before putting them in the fridge for next time. Basically, if you would use cling film for it, you can use a beeswax wrap.

How to care for your beeswax food wrap

Don’t use warm water when cleaning your Abeego beeswax food wraps! Just wipe clean with cold water and a little bit of gentle soap. Using warm water could cause some of the beeswax to rub off. When cared for properly, your Abeego wraps can last for at least over a year. After a while the wraps can contain some stains, as it is a cloth material and staining is likely but this will not affect its performance. Please note that tree resin and beeswax are soluble in alcohol so use alcohol free dish soap to wash your Abeego. Dry them with a towel or hang over a dish rack. Abeego is not suitable for the dishwasher, microwave oven, direct heat or high temperatures.

Inspirational book tips: from Ikigai to Gratitude

Ikigai and gratitude, two words you’ll be hearing a lot this year. It is all about living mindfully and finding one’s purpose, meanwhile appreciating the little things in life. It’s always nice to have some recommendations for new books to read. At least, that’s what I think. Browsing Amazon or a bookshop in town sometimes makes me feel a bit overwhelmed, not knowing what to choose. Since it is the start of the year and self-care and making my life more peaceful overall are themes that currently interest me, I thought I’d share some titles of books I found at The Book Depository that may inspire you as well.

Ikigai : The Japanese secret to a long and happy life

Hector Garcia. Hardback, 208 pages. Price 11,27 € order

Ever heard of the word Ikigai? We all have an ikigai apparently. Even if we don’t know it yet. Ikigai translates as ‘a reason to live’ or ‘a reason to jump out of bed in the morning’. It’s the place where your needs, desires, ambitions, and satisfaction meet: a point of perfect balance, and perfect fulfillment.

On the Japanese island of Okinawa, people live longer than anywhere else in the world. There, finding your ikigai is considered the key to longevity – and to happiness. The Okinawans know that all lives are valuable; for them, your ikigai is the lens that will help bring your value into focus.

If you want to uncover your own ikigai, then this book will help you do this and equip you to change your life. It encourages you to leave stress and urgency behind, and throw yourself into finding your purpose, nurturing your friendships, and pursuing your passions.

Kindness : The Little Thing That Matters Most

author: Jaime Thurston. Hardback 224 pages. price 8,41 € order

An act of kindness, we all have it in us but in our busy lives we often forget how much of a difference you can make by doing it. And how much effort is it? Spend a minute doing something for someone, give a compliment, give up your seat on the bus. This book aims to motivate and inspire you to do more of these little acts.

It uses the voices of those who have been helped by the author’s charity – 52 Lives – to ground the ideas in real life action. The book is themed around 52 simple actions you can do to spread kindness. Interspersed throughout are nuggets of science explaining the positive effect kindness has on the brain and on the heart. This book is a call to action for people to live a more connected, fulfilling life. With inspirational quotes and personal stories this book will give you all the motivation you need to start spreading a little kindness – it’s free after all! Learn to live a life of kindness by following Jaime’s infectious positivity in this charming gift book.

The Art Of Gratitude

Meredith Gaston. Hardback, 200 pages. 18,50 € order

Being grateful for the little things in life can create a huge shift in your happiness and general well-being, when you practice it daily. The art of gratitude is the art of embracing and drawing joy from small moments and pleasures, and being open to inspiration and abundance, joy, peace and love. It’s an art that illustrator Meredith Gaston is well practiced in and uses in her daily life. In this book Meredith’s explores the different aspects of gratitude, adding tips, exercises and inspirational quotes, all beautifully illustrated with water colours.

Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine

Gail Honeyman. Paperback, 400 pages. 10,39 € order

This book intrigues me and I can’t wait to read it! We all get into comfortable habits, think we’re fine and happy with what we have – and often we are. But what if change really is a good thing? What if stepping out of that comfort zone is not as scary if we think?

Eleanor Oliphant has learned how to survive – but not how to live. She leads a simple life. Wears the same clothes to work every day, eats the same meal deal for lunch every day and buys the same two bottles of vodka to drink every weekend. She is happy. Nothing is missing from her carefully timetabled life. Except, sometimes, everything.

One simple act of kindness is about to shatter the walls Eleanor has built around herself. Now she must learn how to navigate the world that everyone else seems to take for granted – while searching for the courage to face the dark corners she’s avoided all her life.

Change can be good. Change can be bad. But surely any change is better than… fine?

  • Winner of the Costa First Novel Award
  • No.1 Sunday Times bestseller and No.1 New York Times bestseller
  • Soon to be a major motion picture produced by Reese Witherspoon


Would you swap your home with a stranger?

Have you ever thought of doing a home exchange during the vacations with a total stranger in a totally different country? The first thought that pops into people’s head is often “oh, I don’t fancy having strangers going through my drawers and what if they wreck the place?” But we have now done home swaps on a number of occasions and we absolutely LOVE it. Here’s why.

new toys and a home from home

The first time we swapped was with a family in Edinburgh during the October holidays and it was amazing. All we needed to do was drive for a couple of hours and we didn’t spend much more money that week than entries to the zoo, a few meals out and normal food shopping. We enjoyed experiencing life in a city neighbourhood, in a gorgeous Victorian house. The kids had the best time, discovering millions of ‘new’ toys. Since then we have done it a number of times, nationally and internationally and it is positive every time.

stranger-danger

Risky? Stranger-danger? Sure, there is always a little bit of risk doing something informal like this, but from experience I can say that most house swappers are kind, caring, helpful, generous and welcoming people. They are willing to give you the keys to their house after all. It is a matter of trust. And, by the way, we have always found our house ten times cleaner than we left it and our cat spoiled rotten.

Home swapping for the holidays. Would you do it? Tips, pros and cons for house exchanges around the world.

The pros of home swapping for the holidays

Well, I could make an endless list, because I am such a fan of the concept, but here are my main reasons for opening my house to people from around the world in return for a stay in theirs.

You cut out the accommodation costs

Let’s be fair, home swapping is not just fun, it also saves you a heck of a lot of money. Imagine having to fork out nightly hotel costs or the rental of a holiday home for a couple of weeks. Even doing AirBnB adds up for a week, no matter how low the price per night is. Home swapping can drastically bring down the cost of your holiday, especially if you are already paying for flights.

It is a home from home

No swanky hotels during a home swap but the comforts of a home. You literally move into someone’s house, so you find their fully kitted out kitchen, comfy sofa’s, a beautiful terrace or garden, shelves full of books and – if you swap with a young family – plenty of ‘new’ toys for your own children to get excited about. You move into a whole new neighbourhood for a bit, get a feel for what it’s like to actually live here. In fact, we once felt so at home during our home swap with a family in Valencia that we ended up moving here permanently, haha!

You get to stay in incredible houses around the world. For free.

You can keep it local and swap with someone in your own country. We have just agreed an exchange to stay a week in a beautiful house in the mountains near Alicante, Spain, which for us is just a short car journey away right now. You may find surprising locations just on your doorstep.

Someone with a quiet cottage in the wilderness may love to come and stay in your inner city apartment. But likewise, someone with a beach house in a hot climate may just be dying to come to the misty west coast of Scotland. Also, if you have always wanted to visit Canada, Australia or the Far East, you can try and swap with someone over there. The flights will be the only pricey aspect, but you’ll be saving a LOT on accommodation. And what better way to travel and get to know a different culture, than by living like a local?

You get insider tips from the home owner

Most home swappers, including myself, find real joy in preparing a welcome pack full of insider tips, hidden gems, maps, brochures and itineraries for lovely days out. It is a great way to get to know a new city or area through the eyes of someone who lives there.

You have pet care sorted

Got cats (or goldfish or chickens…) that need looking after during the holidays? Many home exchangers are happy to look after your pets as well as your home while you are away. Saves additional expenses on catteries and they can stay in their own environment. Of course check with the people you invite whether they are happy to do this kind of thing.

You can even swap cars

If you are not too precious about your vehicle, this is another great saving you can make during a home swap. In the UK you will need to put an additional driver on your car insurance, which won’t be much more than 60 pounds usually and most home swappers are happy to pay this as it is way cheaper than hiring a car. In Europe the car itself is insured, hence you won’t need to pay for additional drivers on your insurance. Not everyone will want to swap cars, but it is especially great when you are unable to bring your own because you are traveling by plane, so worth asking!

The cons

Are there any cons at all? Not many in my opinion, but of course there can be issues which would make you not want to do a home swap.

You will have to tidy up and clean your house beforehand

We underestimated this the first time we swapped, haha! But yes, before you leave your house to your visitors, it is only good manners to clean the house top to bottom and put the clutter and stray clothes and toys away. This can take longer than you think, so good to start early. On a plus note: you will probably come home to your house in an even cleaner and tidier state than you left it. After which my home returns to its usually happy, messy state within half a day.

Things may break

Got a Ming Dynasty vase from your great grandmother on the sideboard? A beautiful, delicate set of glasses you don’t want anyone to touch? Your kids got some new or expensive toys they don’t want to break or get lost? While 9 out of 10 times nothing will go wrong, we are all human and things can break. Guests broke one of our plates, we broke one of their toys. People are mostly honest and tell you immediately, offer to replace the item or leave a bit of money as a ‘sorry’ gift. Still, if you have stuff you definitely don’t want anything to happen to, put it away safely.

If you have a spare room that doesn’t need to be used during the swap, put all your private or fragile stuff in here and ask your guests kindly to respect this room and keep it closed. If you have a key, lock it. We usually let friends of neighbours look after our computer and financial documents for the time we’re away. Not because you expect the guests to rummage through your files and steal your money, but since you haven’t known them for very long, it is only common sense to keep your valuables safe. The rest? Just stuff.

Home swap tips and home swap websites

home exchange websites

Want to give it a go yourself? There are a number of websites you can advertise your house on. You usually pay an annual subscription fee and then you can swap as often as you like. We are currently members of Guardian Home Exchange, which is a UK based website part of the Guardian (newspaper) but it has many international houses on it – including our own one in Valencia. We pay 59 pounds a year membership, which really is not much if you think what you would spend on one night in a B&B alone. There are many others you can try of course, including Home Love Swap, which is the biggest of them all.

find Pet sitters

Another website, which is a slightly different concept, is TrustedHouseSitters.com, a site which doesn’t offer home exchanges (although you can swap in some cases), but on here you’ll find people who offer pet sitting services for free, in return for a stay in your home while you are away. You can also offer yourself as a pet sitter, to find somewhere ‘free’ to stay during the holidays. Again, a huge saving because you don’t have to fork out money for a kennel or a cattery, plus your house is looked after during your vacation. And vice versa, you get to stay in someone’s house for free in return for walking a doggie.

We invited a couple into our home over the Christmas holidays as we were unable to find anyone to look after our cat Buster. I must admit I was slightly apprehensive at first, as it wasn’t a straight swap…Total strangers would pick up our keys from the neighbours and move in…without us having the keys to their property. But I needn’t have worried, because the retired Belgian couple who came were the sweetest cat sitters we could have wished for and when we returned they welcomed us back in our own home with tapas and cava. It seems that it is a certain type of person who is attracted to this kind of holiday. Open-minded, caring, curious, kind and interested in other people, other customs and exploring new locations.

How to prepare your home for listing

Take good photos

A tidy house gives better pictures and better pictures attract more home swap requests. make the beds, clear the clutter, put some fresh flowers on the table, etc. You can shove all the clutter into one room just for the time being until you got your photos done, it doesn’t matter, but make sure that that first impression of your house is good. It’s a bit like getting your house ready for selling. Make it look fab!

describe your house

Place yourself in the shoes of someone who is looking for a house to exchange with. They will want to know how many bedrooms you have, bathrooms, sofabeds etc. Also what kitchen equipment perhaps or things like baby cots and high chairs if you own them. Each exchanger is different, but it is good to describe how your house is suitable for different types of people. Not want tiny sticky fingers on your wall? Make this clear in your listing that you rather want older families or couples only.

Describe your location and area

You may not think of your street or neighbourhood as much, but your guests are excited, it is all new to them and they want to explore. Describe the highlights of your village or town, maybe there is a fine bakery around the corner or some splendid woodland walks. Describe how far larger towns, cities and other attractions such as beaches or mountains are. Tell them about castles, museums, swimming pools or zoos in the area. Anything that will persuade them to get in touch with you for a swap. The nice thing about a home exchange is that you often end up in places you would never normally have gone to, but they turn out to be real hidden gems.

Respond to your messages

If you own a fabulous house in an even more spectacular location, be prepared for lots of messages. We certainly received a few more now we are in Spain than we did when we still lived in Aberdeenshire! Just make sure to respond. You decided to list your house on the site so be polite and reply to people who are interested in coming to stay in your house. Of course you don’t have to sit and wait for an email, you can also fire off requests yourself. Most people are lovely and will tell you straight away if they are happy to arrange an exchange.

Make a welcome pack

A welcome pack can be as simple as an A4 with the workings of your TV, oven and heating system. However, it’s nice to include some ideas for excursions, directions to the nearest bank, shop and public transport, etc. I usually include tourist brochures that I pick up from around town, cultural agendas and business cards of my favourite restaurants. People are very grateful if you take the guessing out of their visit. Provide them with some tried and tested tips for visits you enjoy yourself. Also include some emergency numbers, names of neighbours that may be able to help out in case of anything happening and other info you may think is useful during their stay. I usually also leave a bottle of wine or a yummy delicacy from the local area on the table for the guests on arrival. It is nice to make people feel welcome, and you will likely find similar kindness on the other end.

Self care and listening to your inner voice

I don’t usually do New Year’s resolutions, but this year I decided I would. Or rather: I want to set an intention. Self care. I have seen the word pop up regularly in the past year and I always thought that wasn’t meant for me. I also didn’t quite know what it meant. Pampering? Having your nails done? Spa days? No idea. Others obviously needed all of that for themselves for some reason. I didn’t, because I’m fine – I told myself, and not selfish like that. But you know what? Resilience needs fuel too. Self care is not selfish. It is about setting healthy boundaries and listening to your own needs.

Self care and pouring from an empty cup

I am probably not the only one, but I have given so much of my energy and focus to other people in the past few years that I am running on empty. My body and mind are telling me to take a break. And what do they say again about pouring from an empty cup? Exactly, you can’t. For years I kept pushing myself, just a little bit further, because I didn’t want to let people down or because I felt I “shouldn’t pity myself and just get on with it”. Handle it, woman! Making commitments even though my inner voice told me to go and rest. Saying ‘no’ is not an easy thing when you love what you do, but also have a natural urge to please and look after people.


Stop being your own worst enemy

You sometimes forget that your body and brain are not machines and that you deserve your own kindness too. I really am my own worst enemy sometimes. Ignoring my tiredness and making myself believe I am not that tired. My excitement and enthusiasm taking over as usual and there I go again. Go, go, go! But there’s only so many hours in a day. And by the way, I am also a mother of two small boys. Life is busy indeed. Does this sound familiar? It probably does.

Self care is looking after yourself….for once

I am turning 40 this week. Yesterday I was only 23, right? Time goes so fast. I see my face changing, some wrinkles appearing. The frown in my forehead is now permanent (I blame the kids! ;-)). I guess it’s maybe common midlife musings, but I have realised that I am not immortal. When you’re in your twenties and your thirties you feel life will never end. You bounce back after a night out, you can deal with a bit of tiredness. Turning 40 shouldn’t be such a big thing and I truly am grateful for having made it to this age healthily and without too many life hurdles. It is not given to everyone. But I believe I need to make a couple of small changes to my lifestyle in order to keep my health. Self care is one of them.

Trust your inner compass

So what does this mean to me? Sure, a pampering session will be lovely, but self-care is much more than a day at the spa. It is about caring for the inside. My mental health as well as my physical health. Listening to my body, my signals from the inside. I need to stop ignoring my inner voice, because my inner voice is my compass and she is always right
.

self care tips

Self care is honouring your inner voice

Yesterday I started a job in Valencia at a call center. I lasted until mid afternoon. I pushed myself into thinking “it would be good for that extra bit of money”, “to have colleagues” and “to have a permanent job”. When I applied, my inner voice was already protesting. What did I do? I ignored her. Yesterday morning while still doing the training for the job, my inner voice was protesting again, but my rational brain was telling her to shut up. It wouldn’t be that bad, it was a good thing to have work and a bit of routine. But you know what? I am so glad that I let my inner voice make the decision for me this time.

Sometimes you need little reminders!

Halfway through the afternoon calling session, my inner voice took over and shouted at me: “Why the hell are you doing this to yourself? You didn’t come to Valencia to do this kind of work! I know you hated it twenty years ago, what makes you think it would be any different? You don’t need to do this! It is making you miserable! For goodness sake, woman, I thought you want to do this self-care thing? Not really getting anywhere with this, are you?” Yes, I whispered, you are so right. Thank you. I put down the headphones and told my manager I was going home. I had the most wonderful stroll in the sunshine, in the park. Today I am focusing on my writing again.

Not being busy is something I need to learn and I expect many of you will feel the same. It is such a badge of honour in the western world to always be busy. With work, with stuff. Being idle is seen as a sin, mostly by ourselves.

Self-care is setting healthy boundaries

I also need to learn that it is OK to say ‘no’. Saying no is not about being horrible to people, it is about setting healthy boundaries. Breaking commitments is not a nice thing to do, so it is much better to say no right from the start if you are not sure to begin with. It is no use to anyone if you commit to something and say you will come/help out/do something if your inner voice is already warning you at that very moment. Say you will get back to them tomorrow with your answer, that you need a moment to think about it – this is totally fine. Be honest. To others, but mostly to yourself. If your inner voice is warning you, she will only become louder down the line, until you feel totally resentful to whatever it is you committed to.

We are enough

So what am I going to focus on this year to improve my inner peace and mental health? I am going to release the pressure for a start. Stop expecting so much from myself. I don’t need to achieve and be brilliant at everything. No need to prove anything to anyone. I am enough. I will also allow myself to rest. To take the time. To stop rushing around. It will be hard for me, I know, but it is necessary. I will also address some old pain and trauma trapped inside of me, which – again – I have ignored for years because I felt I should “just get on with it”. I guess I will try and drop the guards. Be confident in showing my vulnerability and not always covering up my feelings with a smile and an “I’m fine”. Be assertive but kind. Strong but soft. Who’s joining me?

Book Tip

The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook : A Proven Way to Accept Yourself, Build Inner Strength, and Thrive.

Are you kinder to others than you are to yourself? More than a thousand research studies show the benefits of being a supportive friend to yourself, especially in times of need. This science-based workbook offers a step-by-step approach to breaking free of harsh self-judgments and impossible standards in order to cultivate emotional well-being.
PRICE: euro 16,88

Journaling ideas for a bullet journal or art journal

Do you like the idea of journaling? Many people do, but some just don’t know where to start. You got a pretty notebook, a set of pens. Now what? Journaling, sketching and doodling doesn’t come natural to everyone.  The thought of filling all those blank pages can be quite alien and even feel a bit daunting. But there is no right and wrong in journaling, because it a private thing. Diaries used to have a lock on them for a reason! Nobody would even dream of taking photos of their diary pages and sharing them with the world (and I am certainly glad I never did, haha!). Today I am sharing some journaling ideas to help you get started.

Why keep a journal? What is it for?

Know that feeling when your head bursts and you feel it all gets a bit much? Journaling can really help to focus the mind when things feel overwhelming, so it is a great tool for keeping mentally healthy. Write down what bothers you or the things that you find important and often it suddenly looks a lot clearer when you see it written down.

FOCUSING THE MIND – SEEING THINGS CLEARLY
STORING AND EXPLORING CREATIVE IDEAS
RELAXATION – MINDFULNESS EXERCISES

Journaling can also be a good way to keep ideas in one place, whether it is for a new business concept or for an artwork that you want to create in the future. Using words combined with images is a very powerful tool to visualise something you want to achieve. It feels a lot more ‘real’ when you start putting ideas and dreams on paper.  Of course keeping a journal can also just be a lovely way to relax and take a bit of time out of a busy day.

journaling ideas

Getting stuff off your chest and visualising dreams

I started writing diaries when I was about eleven and I never really stopped. In my early life it used to be a ‘dear diary’ kind of thing. I wrote almost daily about my thoughts and feelings and it must have helped me get through the years of adolescence. A sort of outlet at the end of the day, getting stuff off my chest. I remember writing pages and pages late at night in notebooks. Do teenagers still do that? It made me develop my writing skills, that’s for sure. As life got busier with work and eventually family, I stopped keeping a daily diary, but always found that journaling helped me focus and visualise my dreams whenever I had ideas for the future. Sticking pictures on pages, doodling, making lists. It makes ideas come to life.

Lesson 1: NO PRESSURE

It doesn’t matter if your journal doesn’t look Pinterest-worthy, it is not meant to be an artwork. And it certainly shouldn’t give you stress and pressure to make those “perfect, beautiful journal pages” you see online. I’d say, ignore Pinterest all together, just start. Write stuff down, stick some pictures in, anything. As long is it gives you joy and it is meaningful to you, you can do whatever you like.

NOBODY WILL JUDGE YOU. YOUR JOURNAL IS PRIVATE

Nobody will judge you, nobody will think you wrote or drew something silly. Nobody has to see it. The main purpose of your journal is for you to have some fun, jot down ideas, keep inspirational images you found, and make it your own personal, private space. Perhaps pencil down some things you’d like to focus on this year. Places you’d like to visit, films you’d like to watch. As a reminder to yourself. Sure, write down goals if you feel you need that kind of push, but hey, be kind to yourself. Life is busy enough, right?

Just start.


Bullet journals and Art journals: what’s the difference?

There seem to be two different types of journals popular right now. ‘Bullet’ journals and ‘Art’ journals. The first type is a bit like a pretty, highly organised diary with months and days and timelines drawn in beautiful letters and it usually features plenty of lists (‘bullet points’), with the purpose to keep you focused on goals and tasks. You can also add lists of your favourite things or the things you are grateful for. Art journals on the other hand are more like a sketchbook in diary form and often feature collages, paintings and little creative experiments, combined with words and text. Of course you can choose whichever you like and you can do a bit of both in one journal.

Not great at drawing? Keep it simple and just write lists, words or quotes that mean something to you. Image: Productive and Pretty
A Bullet Journal often has the dates clearly written and lists drawn on the page. Lists can be anything from to-do-lists to ‘favourites’. It can be a nice way of capturing this moment in your life, the things you enjoy right now, so you will remember in the future. This one has a lot of drawings in it, but of course you can just keep it simple and write lists without the drawings. Image: My Inner Creative
An Art Journal usually has plenty of collages, painting, sketches and drawings (also called ‘mixed media’) as well as quotes and affirmations. Image: ontapfortoday.com

Journaling Ideas to write and draw:

Ideas really are endless when it comes to journaling, so my list are only suggestions. Anything that makes you smile is a good start.

  • Something that made you happy today. It can be a simple as a cup of coffee in silence.
  • A poem you read somewhere that you love
  • Funny quotes from your (grand) children
  • A quote you find inspirational
  • A cut out image from a magazine (or make a mini collage)
  • Things you wish to achieve this year
  • Everything that brings you joy
  • Your favourite songs, books,  food, places, activities
  • A list of people you love and what you admire in them
  • A memory from childhood that makes you happy
  • Reasons to be grateful
  • An affirmation that will make you feel good when reading it
  • Words, images and drawings that make a new idea come to life
  • Drawings, doodles and sketches


Examples of Affirmations for journals

If you believe in the manifestation of positive thoughts and creating your own reality by focusing on what you want in life, then affirmations will be a helpful tool. Write down an affirmation to work on your self image, your self belief or a more positive attitude towards life. The more you write down a certain phrase, the more it will stick. Can’t find the right words? Here is a list of different affirmations you could pick from for your pages if they resonate with you.

Choose an affirmation that you like and want to focus on and write it down in the middle of a page. You can draw a border around the words or fill the rest of the page with drawings if you wish. Doing the additional drawing helps you focus on the affirmation more and let the words really sink into your subconscious. It’s a bit like meditation, you take time to loose yourself in the moment.


Borders and dividers

A wish list, a poem, a quote, a little bit of random text on a page – it will look prettier with a border around it. Doodling borders is not hard, it can be as simple as repeated lines or dots along the page. Drawing patterns like this can be quite meditative too. Here are some journaling ideas for creating pretty borders around the pages.

journaling borders

It’s your journal, you can cry if you want to

Last but not least, your notebook is a dumping ground to have fun in! Do you want to write down all that makes you sad? Go for it it, it may give air. Do you want to remind yourself of all that is good in your life? Try it, it may make you smile. Or do you want to explore your creative talents? Get the pencils, paint, stamps, scissors and old magazines out and go crazy. Journaling ideas are endless and the pages are all yours.

Journals have no rules, unless they have ruled pages.